Preparing for Adolescence: Two Resources to Help You Start the Conversation
Parents, I know this conversation can feel a little intimidating. But I want to encourage you: God has entrusted your child to you, and He has not asked you to do this alone.
Adolescence brings real changes in the body, emotions, friendships, and faith. Your child needs accurate information and a loving guide through the years ahead. If you prepare now by listening, explaining what's coming, and making room for honest questions, those changes are much less likely to catch your child off guard and frighten them. One planned conversation can open the door to many everyday ones.
Why This Milestone Matters
Scripture tells us that even Jesus grew up: He "kept increasing in wisdom and stature, and in favor with God and men" (Luke 2:52). Growing up is part of God's good design, not something to be embarrassed about. Every person bears God's image (Genesis 1:27), and the psalmist could say, "I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made" (Psalm 139:14).
During these years, our kids are quietly asking, "Who am I? Do I belong? Is my body normal? Can I talk to you?" The world will give them plenty of answers. As parents, our job is to keep pointing them back to their Creator, explain God's good design for their bodies and for sex, and let them know home is a safe place to ask anything. You don't need a perfect past or every answer. You need a willingness to learn, speak honestly, and keep walking with your child.
Two Resources We Recommend
Many of our families remember FamilyLife's Passport2Purity, which helped a lot of parents and preteens in years past. As our team has reviewed what's available today, we've landed on two resources we can confidently recommend.
FamilyLife: How to Talk to Your Kids About Sex This free online course is FamilyLife's current offering on the topic. Each session starts with a short "just for parents" video, followed by a video you watch together with your preteen and a discussion guide. Sessions include Your Body, God's Plan; God's Plan for Sex; Renewing Your Mind; God's Gift of Gender; What's Out of Bounds?; and Worth the Wait. Open the FamilyLife course
Focus on the Family: Launch Into the Teen Years Launch is designed for parents to walk through with their 8- to 12-year-old. It includes a Parent's Guide, a Teen Journal, an Anatomy Booklet, and companion videos across six sessions. Topics include identity in Christ, peer relationships, bullies and criticism, a Christian worldview on gender and sex, the physical changes of puberty, and God's loving design for sexuality. Ask us at Cowee about access. Learn more about Launch
How They Differ
Tom Jones, our Family Discipleship Director, put it well: both resources are excellent, but they approach the conversation a little differently.
- FamilyLife is straightforward and conversational, and it gets into the topic fairly quickly. The videos are designed for parents and preteens to watch together, and they handle potentially awkward subjects in a natural, matter-of-fact way.
- Launch takes a broader approach. It begins with identity, relationships, emotions, and God's design for growing up, then gradually moves into puberty and sexuality.
How to Choose
Neither one is necessarily better. Think about your child and about your own personality as a parent. If you're comfortable jumping right into the conversation, FamilyLife may be a great fit. If you'd rather ease into it as part of a bigger conversation about growing up, Launch may feel more natural. Read the two descriptions and see which one makes you think, "That sounds like me."
Whichever you choose, here's a simple next step:
- Preview it on your own first.
- Schedule the conversation. Plan a meal, an outing, or a quiet time at home. The conversation matters more than the cost or the location.
- Keep the door open. Listen, answer truthfully, invite questions, and follow up. You don't have to answer every future question today.
Download Our Parent Guide
Our Preparing for Adolescence parent guide walks through the changes your child will face, God's good design for sex, how to keep the conversation open, and how to protect your child with truth and grace. Download the Preparing for Adolescence Guide (PDF)
Join Us This Fall
Our Milestones That Matter parent classes are offered once a year in the fall. Come learn alongside other parents. You can also visit our Empowered Families page anytime for guides and resources for every stage.
Pray for wisdom and begin. Keep pointing your child to Jesus, and let them know you'll keep walking with them.
By His grace, Pastor Jason